Oscar Sharples, a transgender advocate from the UK, recounts a life-altering journey that culminated in obtaining top surgery. After years of struggle with mental health and societal challenges, Sharples emphasizes the critical importance of gender-affirming care for transgender individuals.
On May 14, 2017, at the age of 16, Sharples experienced a turning point in life when an episode of deep depression led to a suicide attempt. Waking up in the hospital, he found himself grappling with profound feelings of anger and despair. The pain he had previously sought to escape had been replaced by the agony of confinement in a hospital bed. A small but significant act—a hospital bracelet with the name ‘Oscar’—provided a glimpse of hope amidst the turmoil.
Sharples had been out as transgender for two years, supported by his mother, but faced a harsh reality. The emotional toll of losing friends and enduring bullying became a daily struggle. “I had people spit at me in school hallways and send messages telling me to kill myself,” he shared. While these experiences contributed to his mental health crisis, the immediate trigger for his hospitalization was the lengthy wait for top surgery.
Reflecting on his childhood, Sharples noted that until the age of eleven, he had been content. However, as his body began to change, he felt increasingly detached from himself. “With every curve that erupted, I detached further and further,” he explained. This disconnection led to a cycle of self-harm as he attempted to cope with the overwhelming feelings of inadequacy.
It was not until he discovered online communities of transgender individuals that he found a sense of belonging. Inspired by their stories, Sharples sought help from a general practitioner to be referred to a gender clinic. He navigated a lengthy process that included assessments and waiting until he turned 18 for surgery. Unfortunately, due to NHS bureaucracy and the impact of the COVID-19 pandemic, the wait extended to six years.
The long-awaited day finally arrived in April 2021. “Having top surgery was the best day of my life,” Sharples recalled. The relief of being able to live authentically without the constraints of a binder was transformative. Afterward, he moved to university, embracing independence for the first time.
In 2023, Sharples co-founded Transilience, a trans organization in North Devon, alongside his mother. This initiative aims to support transgender youth and advocate for accessible healthcare. Despite his own progress, Sharples highlights the ongoing struggles faced by many in the transgender community. Currently, approximately 42,000 transgender individuals in the UK are still waiting for gender-affirming treatment, with some facing waits of up to eight years to see a specialist.
Sharples expresses deep concern for those still suffering in silence. “Every day that is spent waiting with no support is another life lost,” he stated. He emphasized that gender-affirming care is not just a medical necessity; it is also a matter of life and death.
As he continues his advocacy work, Sharples remains committed to ensuring that others can access the care and support he was fortunate enough to receive. “I have chosen to devote my life to all the people who did not get the chance to live as I do,” he affirmed.
The issues surrounding transgender healthcare and rights are increasingly pressing, and Sharples’ story serves as a poignant reminder of the need for change. His journey underscores the vital role that understanding and compassion can play in the lives of transgender individuals.
